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Is online dating really safe and acceptable for Christians?

Many people are apprehensive at first about online dating. This is a normal reaction because it is fear of the unknown.

However, online dating is popular and more accepted in today's society.
In this fast moving society, many people have less time to socialize with others. More people are working harder and longer hours, trying to make ends meet. Thanks to new technologies, online single dating is fast becoming a common means of meeting people.

Do people really lie on online dating sites?
Most people are honest. Unfortunately, not everyone is truthful about the information they will give you. Sometimes people lie out of fear of being rejected.

This type of person may lie about his weight, looks or other physical features. This has to do more with insecurities, in which we all suffer from at one time or another.

Others may not tell the truth because they do not want something to be uncovered in their life. These people may lie about their job, occupation, income or whether they are seeing someone else.

Still, some may not be truthful because they are habitual liars. These people will lie about almost anything. Where they live, their occupation and assets.

Keep your eyes open for people who are being dishonest. Christian relationships are founded on trust and if you can't trust an individual, then quickly move them out of your search for a potential Christian match.
How do I choose a Christian Dating Partner?
As a Christian, it should be important for you to have Christ-centered relationships. Wisely consider if the person you are dating is one of good character and morals. This includes friendship, as well as dating mates. One thing to keep in mind: do not be in such a hurry! Be certain their beliefs line up with yours. Some religions can differ in beliefs when it comes to the bible and the deity of Jesus Christ. Allow a new relationship to grow. Get to know each individual and each individual is needs also, including your own. This is especially important for single Christian parents.
http://www.christianmingle.com/tips_and_advice/safe_dater.html
THOUGHTS

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Replies to This Discussion

I wonder about the success rate of online dating. Seems like success is the exception to the rule. Is it really possible to fall in love with someone you have not seen and met? I fear the outcome of dating online and falling in love online and then eventually having to meet in person to make things real. But just the same... anyone could be the exception.
Macky do not fall in love with anyone through phone and e-mail. And yes, it is possible, all things are possible with God, not to fall in love by keeping it real and not allowing yourself to fall for a person until you have met and confirmed they are who they claim to be. Even with tangible relationships one must take his time to establish whether the person walks the talk.

Blessings
David, it's just like you to bring me down to my senses, eh? Thanks so much for your valuable advice, I treasure all the things I hear from people that might be used by the Lord to get to me. You are absolutely one of them.

You know I have met someone here in AAG. He's truly a Godly person, and we share the same thoughts about allowing God to lead us to whatever purpose He may have in having us meet in the chat room. As much as in my heart, I would like this to be IT, I also must surrender my will to God as I've been in a situation before that my own understanding of things failed me. I have to trust in God completely now if I want it to work. I believe He knows better. I may be a BS Applied Physics graduate, MS Envt Studies student, teacher and writer in the field of science, but I have learned that no logic and reasoning can explain how God moves. Who knows the mind of the Lord, right?

I think, if this guy makes it to meet up with me in person, brave the vast oceans between us then... I'll pray about it again, haha, "what could that mean, Lord"?

I really appreciate your insights here Dave. I am much much less confident about my own thinking and understanding after my heartbreak that I do need guidance. But as you already might have sensed, my stubborness remains intact... haha! Love and blessings to you!
dear david...
i known this one guy a year from online... and now he is my boyfriend even though we never meet each other... well, before i know him i'm not believe that i can fall in love with someone that i never meet... but, after sometimes knowing him... i realize that he is good and now im serious with our relationship.. but, my parents seems like not encourage me to continue this relationship because they said that i still don't know him and besides he is living in another state... i dont know... but i really love him... he is also a christian but not a catholic... he tells me that its been a long time he didint went to church because the place where he studying is not near the church... sometimes i'm trying to do something such as bring him along by praying through the phone before sleep and pray ask God to guide and bless our relationship.. i dont know what else to do so that we can feel the presents of God in our relationship... i realy hope that he is the one for me... but, sometimes i'm scared i will make the wrong decision... i hope the time will make us know more about each other... haha, sorry for making use of your time by reading this... anyway, i'm glad to share this with someone... sorry, my english is not good... thanks bro... have a blessed day... God Bless... ^_^
Hello Sister Miz, sorry to jump in. I advise that you pray this simple prayer.

1. Pray for forgiveness of sins, iniquities, etc.
2. Pray that God should take away all friends that are not from Him away from you.
3. Pray that anyone that is not from God who has intensions for you should never feel comfortable with you. Tell Him that you may want him but if God has not chosen him, he should never feel comfortable with you.
4. Finally, tell God that it is only His ideal spouse for you that will feel comfortable with you.
Sister, online relationships are not to be trusted, but he may be the right spouse for you. Only God can prove this. Please pray the above prayer with all your heart and believe He has heard you.
There is one thing I have leant; you cannot tell God to bless what He had not ordained. So rely on Him when you need a spouse and don’t choose on your own and tell Him to bless the relationship. This is one of the things that promote divorce in the world today.
Your parents may be right. And from the guy’s character, it is obvious that God is not the first in his life: this could be very dangerous.

And note that it’s only God that can change someone. Love can hardly change someone. He may seem changed because he’s in love but he can only pretend to be. A time will come when the true character will reveal itself again, at that time, the love may have expired.

I do hope I have made some sense.

Thank you for sharing this.

God bless everyone.

Louis.
dear Louis,

thanks bro Louis for the advice... i realize it... only God knows the best for us...
well, actually i became scared after read your post... i was thinking should i continue all this...?
how can i know that it is him who God sent for me...? sometimes i was confused... don't know what to do.... anyway, thanks for you meaningful advice...

friends,
miz nell

have a blessed day...
Beloved Miz-

Bro Louis has given you excellent advice and I will tell you the following. God has established guidelines in His word for almost all aspects of life.

Your husband should be your Spiritual leader not the other way around. Choosing a work in progress guy can bring you a lot of pain.

His spirituality shows in his neglect to go to Church. There are churches everywhere now these days and on camp bible studies almost in all universities.

Tell me sis, does He ever tell you to study with him or to pray with you? If he doesn't, he is not the spiritual leader a Godly woman should desire.

I have met Christian woman both through on line dating and through school, church who I have offered to pray with or study with only for them to tell me that I talk a lot about God ahahahaha in my mind I am like thank you Lord for showing me this is not the one. I drop the friendship immediately and these are woman who do go to church and some are active in ministry, but that is not the woman for me. Nor should that be the guy for you.

blessings beloved
DEAR BRO DAVI...

me and him are from different kind of church... i ask him recently whether he wants to follow me to my church in the future or not and he still cant give the answer... i always bring him along praying through the phone... i always remind him to pray and read the bible... i realy wnt him to be closed to god... not because of me but because of his williness and love to god.... i love him... i want him to know abaut jesus too... really want... dont know what to do anymore... please pray for me and for him....

love in christ,
miz nell...
Miz,

Read Annie's comments on this subject below and all the others if you haven't yet. This guy at least is being honest, which is a blessing. By him not answering your question whether if he would go to church with you or not, he is screaming, I am not. Which is a good thing for you, many other guys would tell you whatever you want to hear to get your heart, but God is blessing you with plenty of warnings about this relationship sis and you have to make some tuff decisions. Please think about it young sis and choose to please God. Don't allow your flesh to drive you in such an extremely important decisions.

From what I have heard from you so far I would not recommend being in love with this guy. Sis the most precious and important person in our lives should be Jesus and if someone does not share that with us (our mate primarily)there is no yoke and we will be miserable.

Think about it and pray on it. As your big brother and a minister of the Gospel beloved I must tell you the truth even if you don't like me for it (not saying you are the kind of person who would dislike me for telling you the truth, but just saying) I do not know your boyfriend's heart and mind, so seek the Lord for answers and please understand that if a guy is not even answering you in a positive way to such an elementary practice for us Christian, it does not look good for him. Going to church for us is so second nature and essential.

Ok sis do know I love you in Christ and I have your best interest in mind.

Love to you sis.
Excellent comment sister Annie.

God bless you all.

Louis.
SO TRUE BUT BETTER TO GIVE UP HURT EARLY RATHER THAN LATER HARDER TO HEAL
Hello Miz, I trust everyone is doing great.

Sister, here is the answer to your question “i was thinking should i continue all this...?
how can i know that it is him who God sent for me...?” I did not tell you to discontinue your relationship in my post. I have given you the key to getting a God ordained partner. Before you can use this key, you have to first of all believe that God answers prayers and also believe that THE JUST SHALL LIVE BY FAITH. This is a scripture we all should apply in all areas of our lives. The words of God are not mare words; they are lights unto our paths. In other words, God will discontinue it for you if it’s not meant to be. Pray that God should remove all friends that are not from Him from you and whomever He has not chosen should flee from you… It’s simple… and wait for the result. Ultimately, to get your spouse, you have to be very patient, humble, and rely on God and God alone. Do not plan anything, just pray that He should let only the one you have chosen be attracted to you and by His divine arrangement, He should bring the two of you together.
You may not like the person He has chosen at first, He usually test us that way, but by the time you have accepted whom He gave you then shall He bring out the true beauty. This has happened to me. I even have a book on this subject: relationships, dangers and precautions, and how to maintain a Godly relationship (though this is not the title). It’s currently with Strategic Books there in USA. It’s unfortunate that Christians of today do not trust God when they ask Him for help, instead they apply a plan B by helping God with the very request they asked Him. He will only act if we rely totally on Him because He wants to be sure that He is getting all the glory.

“How do you know the right person?” Nobody will tell you this is the right person and no one can tell you the qualities of someone who is right for you, but God himself will speak to your heart and you will know by yourself that “this is the person I have been longing for”. It’s all God’s work: he will carry all you desire in a spouse and above all, you will have similar common interests (i.e. your faith in the Lord and His Kingdom).

Your Husband should love God and you also should love God. God should be the first in your family; and to achieve this, the qualities of "God is the first" should first be seen in your relationship. This is the only way to know if actually your relationship is Godly or not.

Many people go to the altar and say “What God has put together let no one separate” and some months, years, etc. later, the separation takes place. This is because God did not put together in the first place, Man did. So do not let your relationship be based on human understand, let it be based on whom the Lord has chosen and His word that never fails.

Finally, I have to advise you that if you are not willing to lose some of the people you call friends, do not pray this prayer and if you are interested in the desires of men, this prayer is not for you. If you are willing to submit totally to His will, then pray the prayer. Only then, can He choose for you according to His will and direct your paths, and give you a glorious end (Till death do you path).

I will stop here for now sister. Please ask questions if you are mislead in anyway.

God bless you all.

Peace.

Louis.

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