Okay to chat with deceased loved ones?

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Permalink Reply by Ron Payne on September 21, 2009 at 10:59pm

Hi GinnyBear,

I fully understand how you feel. Quite often I feel the same way, but it's not so much wanting to talk to them, but simply that I miss them. Our thoughts of them should not be by way of talking to them but simply to remember them.

No doubt many here on AAG will point you to the following verse:

"For the living know that they shall die: but the dead know not any thing, neither have they any more a reward; for the memory of them is forgotten." Ecc 9:5

The living know that they shall die - This is so self-evident that none can doubt it; and therefore all that have this conviction should prepare for death and eternal blessedness of not being separated from God.

But the dead know not any thing - Cut off from life, they know nothing of what is going on under the sun. Their day of probation to attain or lose eternal life is ended, and therefore they can have no further reward in living a holy life; nor can they be liable to any further punishment for crimes in this state of probation. All activity or conversation with those on earth has come to an end.

Neither have they any more a reward The reward spoken of here are the rewards for the things we accomplished here on earth. Once we die there is no further opportunity of obtaining salvation, or doing good works. Our reward for what we accomplished here on earth during this our probation period, will either be Heaven or sadly, Hell.

"And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment:" Heb 9:27

With the above verse in mind it is of utmost importance that we do not tally or waste time in accepting the gift of God while we have the opportunity.

Behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation. 2Cor 6:2

I trust that anyone reading this and has not turned to God for forgiveness or accepted Christ as their Saviour and His death on the Cross for their sins, please do it now. Eternity cannot wait.

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved. He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. Jhn 3:16 -18

Ron

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Permalink Reply by deedee310 on September 22, 2009 at 12:04pm

Hi Ron,
I have a couple of questions for you, you stated that once a person passes this life then they have no memory of anything under the sun. I was always told that we would remember our loved ones in the after life and that we would know them once we get to heaven. Also, in the parable of Lazarus and the Rich Man, the rich man remembered Lazarus and how he treated him once he was in Hades. I am just trying to get a clear understanding of this and what the scriptures say.
Thank you
DEE

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Permalink Reply by Ron Payne on September 22, 2009 at 12:35pm

Hi Dee,

The dead do have a memory of what was done and not done by them while they were alive, this would include their memory of family and friends etc. BUT what is actually going on under the sun after their departure from earth. They do not know. Their period of probation here on earth is finished. There is nothing further for them to know and there is nothing they can do to change anything of their past life. i.e Warn or encourage their loved ones.

Think of a Baseball match that you attended for thirty minutes and then had to leave. You will be fully aware of what had taken place and even the score. But after you left because you had to leave, you had no further idea of what was happening at the game. Neither is there anything you could do to help your side win. You would be too far away for them to hear your shouts of encouragement.

Regarding Lazurus and the Rich man, yes they remembered each other and the Rich man even remembered that he had two sons. All he knew about them was their spiritual condition when he had died. For all he and we know is, they may have even changed and become Believers, but he would not know this and continue to think of his sons as lost.

I trust this helps.
The Lord Bless you in your search for a closer walk with Him
Ron

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Permalink Reply by deedee310 on September 22, 2009 at 5:15pm

Thank you so much for clearing this up for me. This is a subject that has been on my mind and heart since I lost my brother a year ago.

DEE

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Permalink Reply by Theresa on September 22, 2009 at 10:09pm

Hi Ginny,
I feel strongly that talking to deceased loved ones is very very wrong. I believe the scripture that says to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord. I believe that our loved ones who are in heaven, are there and so happy, they have no care whatsoever, they are walking on the streets of gold, I believe once our loved ones see Jesus, what do they care about this earth or anybody on this earth, they are praising their Lord and savior face to face.
I strongly believe that during a time of grieving, when we loose a loved one, the devil knows how we feel, how vulnerable we are and he comes and tempt us to talk to our loved ones who are gone with the Lord. I would not do it, what I would do is talk to Jesus instead and tell Him how much I miss them.
Love you and bless you my sister...

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Permalink Reply by Naka on September 23, 2009 at 3:55am

Hi there, I do not believe that it really is a good thing. I used to dream about my mom for a long time and also visited her graveside to talk to her. I would , for instance ,ask her forgiveness for the mess my brothers and sisters (we) are in and know it would displease her. God, however is against this whole thing of talking to the dead. Remember how Saul asked the witch to call up the spirit of Samuel the prophet? Let the dead be, they can do nothing to aid us. Once we cross that line only one or the other thing remains: facing God as His child or guilty before him. Familiar spirits aredemonic and satan uses it to make us believe we are dreaming,talking to our loved ones. They are just that-demonic. Let go of the dead, let them just go. I will talk to you again. have to go. God bless. Will give some scriptures where appropriate.

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Permalink Reply by GAD_578 on September 23, 2009 at 11:18am

First off the use here of Ecc.9:5 is out of context exspelling the difference between the spirit body (1st death) and the physical body (2nd death). 2nd cor. 5:7-10 / Ecc.12:6-7
A soul is made up of both spirit and flesh according to gen. At physical death the spirit seperates from the flesh. so "Soul sleep" is mis understood by the masses. Just as many don't know that the english sources use the term hell to describe different places and states. One term gehena symbolizes both a spirit death and a physical death, another means PHYSICAL grave and we also have mention of the lake of Fire /SPRITUAL DEATH. so it makes perfect sense when we compare the scriptures to see where they agree to find out that the physical body has no spirit after physical death cause we are told what a spirit is (mind, intelect, faith, heart, love, belief, ideologies) and we are told that at the 2nd death one shall perish and will not even be remembered anymore nor will there spirit exsist so that exsplians the memory of them forgotten.
The day of death is better than the day of birth in the spiritual view! I have studies I share on where are the dead and exsposing the false theory of pre trib but I am posting on this thread to mainly say that overall spirits of the spirit realm have an exsistance going on that does not revolve around the physical realm. That is changeing more and more as we come closer to the great Apostacy.
To consult spirits in the spirit realm can make way for demonic activity. Always interested in cover MORE on the subject

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Permalink Reply by Ron Payne on September 23, 2009 at 10:14pm

Hi Gad,

We were discussing the possibility of communicating with loved ones and friends who have died. This I believe is a definite "NO!" Simply because these souls are no longer aware of what is going on under the Sun since their departure and as another member here said, they would be far to busy taking in everything that surrounds them and their total awareness of Jesus Christ Himself. Also God forbids this form of communication.

I don't quite understand the explanation you gave, when you say I have taken Ecc 9:5 out of context.
Unless of course you are referring to and promoting the doctrine of "Soul Sleep". If you are, I would caution you to "walk' down this road with extreme care, as this particular doctrine, namely "Soul sleep", would have Jesus our Lord a Liar and St. Paul adding to and thereby confirming those lies.

I trust that this is not the case and that my assumption concerning your thoughts and possible belief is wrong.

Ron.

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Permalink Reply by Gayla on September 23, 2009 at 8:36pm

I don't think God would mind if we talk with them, as long as we understand that is not ok, to actually try to bring back their spirit, or any other spirit, for that matter. Many people set on or by the grave of a loved one, and talk to them..knowing that they will not talk back. It would be kinda like writing a letter to them... comforting to you, and harmless in my thinking.

What the bible warns against is actually trying to contact them, thru mediums, or seances.... we can easily be fooled by evil spirits, if we try to do this. But, just talking to them, I think is harmless, and comforting for some. If grief is locked up inside, it needs to come out, or it can do damage I believe.

Talking out your pain, I think would actually be healthy. Talking to a grief counselor is good also. Or writing letters, to a loved one... would help get your feelings out in the open... things that are stuffed within.. are harmful. Get out your feelings.... and then, you can begin to heal, and move forward. Esp. in the case of a loved one dying in an accident, without any thought of it taking place, puts one in shock... and is harder to deal with, than someone who has been sick for a very long time, and you are mentally prepared to let them go.

A letter... or a talk is a way of releasing grief... in my thinking.

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Permalink Reply by Ginnybee on September 24, 2009 at 5:13pm

Thanks y'all! I sensed the practice was not a good one, but wanted to ask for others' thoughts about it because my own ideas weren't particularly grounded in recollected scriptures. Honestly, I had hoped the responses I got would provide that the dead do not know what is happening here any longer, because I loath to imagine my deceased dad still being burdened with the things of this world. I much rather think he is in complete peace, and I believe God in that when we die and go to heaven there will be no more worries. If we remain keeping track of what is happening here, I don't see how we can experience the kind of peace God described. Thanks!

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