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Hi, 

I'm wondering what it is that makes and man and woman married before God.

Is it the ceremony conducted by a pastor that makes a marriage legit before God?

Is it the secular marriage license that makes the marriage to be legit before God?

Both?

Where does one draw the line of fornication?

My "husband" and I haven't been officially married, in that we don't have a marriage license. We had a private "wedding ceremony" with just the two of us where we each recognized our lifetime commitment in marriage to one another before God. Is this enough? Are we biblically speaking, committing fornication?

I appreciate any input!

Thanks, 

Jenny

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A lot of times men don't want to make that final commitment for some reason. The old quote "Why buy the cow when the milk is free" could be another reason they won't commit. It definitely wouldn't hurt if you went to the court house for the sake of your testimony. It will put that bow on your commitment. I think that not getting married legally is a sign that you're not sure whether the relationship will last - just my opinion. 

1 Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God. 2 Therefore whoever resists the authorities resists what God has appointed, and those who resist will incur judgment. Romans 13:1-2

17 Honor everyone. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the emperor. 1 Peter 2:17

Matthew 3: 5 and said, Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh?

2 But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. 1 Cor 7:2 Here we see that those who have sex outside of marriage is committing a sexual sin. 

"A lot of times men don't want to make that final commitment for some reason." My husband feels we have made the final commitment, and so is resentful of the thought that a court document is what would make our commitment final. 

You do present some things I need to pray about for sure. 

I know my husband is a little hurt that I want to "really make it really official", so I need to be sensitive to how I talk about it. 

I know I'd feel better about having our marriage legally recognized though, and I think I can get my husband to do it for me, but I guess I want him to want to as well and not just be going along with it to please me. 

I will def be praying that he doesn't take it so personally. I would also say to him that it's a desire of your heart & it only takes 30 minutes. Tell him that it's not about your commitment because obviously, you're committed. Tell him it's just something you yearn for.

thank you!

very good points except a government which legalizes abortion legalizes same sex marriage legalizes prostitution  etc. etc.  They are appointed by God.  I believe that statement has been taken way out of context.    Matthew 3:5  or 1 Cor. 7:2  I donot see anything suggesting we should give marriage over to the government.  In the licensing process we have done just that.

          Give onto Ceasar that which is Ceasars......... marriage is a gift from God.

So, could you educate us about what it does mean within the context please? 

We are not to be a stumbling block for anyone. How would it look to share God's Word with a Budweiser in your hand? How can you tell someone that you follow the Lord while committing fornication in their eyes? It's about the testimony not the paper.

Every good & perfect gift is from God. Doesn't mean we do as we please just because the state is wrong on other issues. The same governments that held Israel captive was the same governments God put into place.

First of all I am not saying don't go through the legal process for protection. All I am saying is the legal process does not make a marriage.  You ask me to educate you within context and I have asked many years for someone to do the same for me. Show me in scripture where God has instricted that marriage is a result of a legal document controlled by the gov't. Show me where Jesus instructs us to take vows any order to make anything proper. 

        Yes the ceremony and the festivaties are beautiful and yes they hold great meaning. and yes the wedding(a festive banquet) gives a public recgognition which is important.

        Yet we in the church have developed laws which I have often wondered where the scriptural backing is .

         I do understand the history of the laws and the purpose of the laws today. therefore if people do not feel peace in their present situation then they should most likely fill the law.

         Yet we as Christians do we have the right to persecute people because they have not fulfiled our law. Even though they were brought together by God.

          You make the point that God appointed our present Governments  it seems to me when the people wanted a king and werent satisified with God's appointed people He gave them a king. Yet in doing so He was not what I would call happy. And yes to paraphrase He said you wanted a king I have given one now follow him. Yet it most definately did not please Him. And todays gov't the way they operate I cannot see how it is pleasing Him in anyway. They have made money their god.

Thankyou appreciate the thoughts and very valid thoughts. 

    " Even Jesus attending wedding ceremonies and the Bible is filled with passages on wedding parables, brides, bridegroom, etc" What is the meaning of the word wedding  literal translation Festive celebration.   It is a celebration of the coming together of the two people.  And as you say ask

      " what then of two people who marry not concerned with what God thinks, who don't seek God's advice and simply lust after one another or marry because its convenient or what they thought they wanted and don't care about real vows or God's desire for them?  Are they NOT married in God's eyes?"  No they are not they are committing fornication.  

         

if we claim a marriage is in the eyes of God and not via man's laws, what then of two people who marry not concerned with what God thinks, who don't seek God's advice and simply lust after one another or marry because its convenient or what they thought they wanted and don't care about real vows or God's desire for them?  Are they NOT married in God's eyes? - I thought this same thing. Remember the woman at the well? He told her to go get her husband. She said she didn't have a husband & He said oh but you have 5

what does this mean? so are non-christians not really married even if they get married in the conventional sense?

Yes and he also said she had spoken the Truth  and further in the account stated the true worshipper will worship in Spirit and Truth.   Take a good look at that woman and the life she was forced to live how was she worshipping.

Dean,

But you said I was taking Scriptures out of context. I ask you to educate me on the context. I take that accusation pretty seriously because I know many religions that do take Scriptures out of context to satisfy how they want to live their life instead of how they Should live their lives. If I'm using Scripture to suit my purpose, I definitely want to know. I have kids watching my life & I would never desire to lead them astray.

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