A problem which I just can't identify...

Argh I feel so stuck right now, so cut off from God, or the work of the Holy Spirit.

There was a time, I was feeling great, just singing praise to him and worship came so natural every day...

Something is wrong...



I want to serve him, to work for him, to give my life to him because he died for me.

Everyone is dying of something, I want to die for him!

I know, I have got to die to self, and surrender to His leading.

But something is wrong... I want to grow... I want to understand and do His will...

My prayer life... my praise life... my walk with God.



Something is missing right now, the honesty, the sincerity, the truth and the love of Jesus...

I need to find what is blocking these things because it is killing me spiritually, and preventing a revival in my church!

Am I hiding from God? Is he saying, "Jeremy, where art thou?" I just don't know...

I need a job...
I need time spent with my saviour...
I need to learn to praise him, thank him, and share his love with others...
communication for me is not instant, and is so awkward, even wrong...
I'm not really confident with myself... with my thought life... with my physical life... with any of it...

I know I need to get to what is the root of this problem, before fellowship is restored...

I believe in Jesus Christ, the only begotten son of the Father, I believe he was sent to earth by God, he died to take away my sin, and rose again, and now is alive and sits in heaven at the right hand of God the Father. He sent his Holy Spirit, the Comforter, to lead and to guide me into all truth, he has given this gift to me. I believe His word. It is a light unto my feet, and a lamp unto my path.


Ah, the issue of surrender. I've got to surrender my thoughts, my desires, my goals, and my dreams... over to His control.

Repentance - it is turning away from my own thinking.. my own ways... and oh yeah, my own selfish desires. (underline, in italics, with an exclamation point.)

"Ye lust, and have not: ye kill, and desire to have, and cannot obtain: ye fight and war, yet ye have not, because ye ask not. Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts." (James 4:2,3)


I'm learning in James chapter 4 about lust. That he talks about different kinds of lusts, the sensual sinful lusts, and then the supposed "good" lusts like "Oh it would be a very good thing for you to have the perfect job and the perfect wife and the perfect house and all the good things of life!" But this is friendship with the world! I tell you NO!! I do not want these things, but I want the Kingdom. Jesus says "Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness" and that is what I need to have because if I don't have that first then anything I "conquer" would be absolutely meaningless. We are more than conquerors! And so I must surrender, allow the Holy Spirit to work through me, and trust in God."

Ahh me, what should I do? Comments, suggestions, ideas?