I need strength, courage and confidence, enough for both myself and for my family.

My father has lost everything, save myself, his wife and two dogs. His health appears to be suffering too. He had cancer at once stage, and has now been for tests again just to check, and it appears that they might have found something again, although we are waiting for confirmation and details. His wife has just recovered from cancer herself. He has lost two of his best friends who were both victims of suicide, who both contributed to him losing everything, because they stole from him and his business before killing themselves. Everything is now uncertain for him, and he has no idea what tomorrow will bring. It's just one misfortune after the next. My mother too, is developing certain health problems and at the moment she is finding it difficult to walk because of her back. I don't know if it's just a spasm, or something more serious. My mother is a saint, and I truly wish that she could find the peace that she deserves.

As for myself, I was never really a good person. I was ignorant and selfish, and even so, my parents sacrifice everything to give me a chance in the world, when they have little to give. I am 25 and I am studying 3D/animation this year, at great cost to my family. I started very well, and I want to finish very well, but over the last few weeks I have been losing focus and I don't know why. The best thing I can do for my family, is to do well this year and make them proud, and hopefully get work at the end of this that will allow me to take care of them in some way. This will be one less thing for them to worry about.

It is today, that I choose to surrender. Above everything, I wish to conquer my bodily desires and gain control of myself for the first time, and thus surrender control to the Lord himself, and live purely through faith, with no fear. To do this, would be the greatest gift that I could give to my already troubled family, and to myself, and to the Lord.

Please, anyone. I need my focus and clarity to return to me in a hurry. Please help me pray for my family ...and for myself. The ball is in my court now, I need to hit a home-run, for my family, for their future and mine.

God bless.