Dear Joseph, When we read and study the Bible we are learning all about who God is. Yes he does love you. Even though we all at times have walked away from him, he never ever walks away from us. By choosing to learn all about Jesus and follow him we are led straight to the Father. By being born again in Christ we are given the Father's Holy Spirit. Choose God. Choose life.
Unlike us, God's love is "perfect love" (see 1 Corinthians 13) he has promised us not to forsake us (Hebrews 13:5), (Deuteronomy 31:6) God will change your heart Joseph if you let him.
A prayer for you from Psalms:
12 I am the talk of those who sit in the gate,
and the drunkards make songs about me.
13 But as for me, my prayer is to you, O Lord.
At an acceptable time, O God,
in the abundance of your steadfast love answer me in your saving faithfulness.
14 Deliver me
from sinking in the mire;
let me be delivered from my enemies
and from the deep waters.
Your Brother in Christ,
Joseph, I hear your plea for help in resolving your situation. We are all wanting God to just take away the desire, then we feel we can overcome, if we just didn’t have the desire there would be no problem, right?
We do the same with obesity, pornography, etc, Not understanding 2Pet.1:2,3,4, God has already given to us all things that pertain unto life and godliness through the knowledge of Him, who has called us unto glory and virtue. Whereby are given to us exceeding great and precious promises, that by these we might be partakers of His Devine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.
But the Word says in 2Tim.2:20 But in a great house there is not only vessels of gold and of silver, but also of wood and of earth, some to honor, and some to dishonor, if a man would therefore purge himself from these, he shall become a vessel unto honor, sanctified, meet for the master’s use, and prepared unto every good work.
See Joseph, we have a part to play in this life. Some call it sacrifice, but God says in Ps.51, He does not desire sacrifice, or burnt offerings but a broken spirit and a contrite heart, He will not despise.
We are delivered and set free by accepting, and obeying the Word of God. The work has already been done, it is up to us to accept, or reject it.
Following is a few verses; some with commentary from Adam Clark, and Barnes, I think it would be very beneficial to you if you would just ponder them, and ask God to open your eyes to truth; “the Word of God”
May God bless you, and my prayers are with you. JB
Matthew 16:24-26 (KJV)
24 Then said Jesus unto his disciples, :If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me-.
25 For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it.
26 For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?
Will come after me—i.e. to be my disciple. This discourse was intended to show Peter and the rest of the disciples the nature of his kingdom; and that the honor that cometh from the world was not to be expected by those who followed Christ.
The principles of the Christian life are:
First. To have a sincere desire to belong to Christ—If any man be Willing to be my disciple, etc.
Secondly. To renounce self-dependence, and selfish pursuits—Let him deny Himself.
Thirdly. To embrace the condition which God has appointed, and bear the troubles and difficulties he may meet with in walking the Christian road—Let him take up His Cross.
Fourthly. To imitate Jesus, and do and suffer all in his spirit—Let him Follow Me.
Adam Clarke's Commentary.
Let him deny himself. That is, let him surrender to God his will, affections, body, and soul. Let him not seek his own happiness as the supreme object, but be willing to renounce all, and lay down his life also, if required.
Barnes' Notes on the New Testament.
Titus 1:16 (KJV)
16 They profess that they know God; but in works they deny him, being abominable, and disobedient, and unto every good work reprobate.
2 Timothy 2:11-13 (KJV)
11 It is a faithful saying: For if we be dead with him, we shall also live with him:
12 If we suffer, we shall also reign with him: if we deny him, he also will deny us:
13 If we believe not, yet he abideth faithful: he cannot deny himself.
Proverbs 21:2-3 (KJV)
2 Every way of a man is right in his own eyes: but the LORD pondereth the hearts.
3 To do justice and judgment is more acceptable to the LORD than sacrifice.
1 Samuel 15:22-23 (KJV)
22 And Samuel said, Hath the LORD as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the LORD? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice, and to hearken than the fat of rams.
23 For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry. Because thou hast rejected the word of the LORD, he hath also rejected thee from being king.