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I've noticed that whenever I am feeling the most lonely there really is nobody to talk too.  My thoughts have been, maybe there is sin in my heart and therefor God is punishing me?  He punishes those He loves...  I've been noticing this issue for years, so I thought I'd just put this out there for you guys and see what kind of replies I receive.  Perhaps I don't spend enough time with God.  But that doesn't make sense because there are people who spend even less time with God then I do.  And yet they are not alone nearly as much as I.  I'm still praying and asking God to open a door for me.  A church or anything that I could fit into.

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I don't think it is wrong to feel lonely.  I feel lonely sometimes and I dislike that feeling.  It is a feeling that takes me no where.  I feel lost,  miserable, an unwanted feeling like no one cares.  I don't think it is God's fault that I feel that way, it is my fault that I go through that feeling.  I feel self pity for myself...that's a sad feeling.  There are days I want to feel lonely.  Why does it happen to me I say, others are so happy....did I do something wrong, God why won't you notice me.  Tjan onee morning at 3 am I woke up crying feeling lonely, I lifted my hands up and asked God help me cos I hated this feeling, I feel lonely even knowing you are there for me, why is this happening to me.  Will you comfort me when I am alone, what can I do God.  I just kept praying and without me realising it I felt so drained and slept off.  The next morning, I was so refreshed and alert and everything seem well, I forgot the lonely feeling and thanked God cos he showed me that when I am lonely, just look for him and he is there to listen. 

Lord, favour others who are lonely, just as you favoured me.   Father you always bring the best of us in most difficult times.....Amen

You have the wrong word.  God CHASTISES those whom He loves.  I went through this same question and so I researched chastisement and punishment.  Punishment is something done after the fact, a kind of "get even" deal.  It is not done to correct a behavior, but done out of anger.  Chastisement is CORRECTION.  It is done out of love to correct one's behavior.  It is like not allowing your child outside for a week because they went out into the street.  You don't want them hit by a car.  They feel they're being punished.  You feel you're protecting them and want it to stand out in their mind next time not to go into the street again.

God may be wanting you to learn something from this alone time, or He will provide something greater for you later that you can look back to this time and realize how He pulled you out of it and give Him all the glory for it.  But the answers don't come easy or overnight.  He strengthens us through difficulties.  And that is not a punishment, but it is His making us stronger to handle things better in the future. 

Being alone is not a bad thing. I prefer it because lately I am nothing but a tool to people they use me as they see fit and throw me away. Being alone is better for me personally, but if you dont like it try to reach out to make new friends and go from there.

31 Jesus asked, “Do you finally believe? 32 But the time is coming—indeed it’s here now—when you will be scattered, each one going his own way, leaving me alone. Yet I am not alone because the Father is with me. 33 I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.”

I spend a lot of time alone and it is very hard sometimes.  It's not wrong to feel lonely.  I'm feel it almost every day, because my friends work and I am alone most of the day.  Getting involved in a church, or even on this site will help.  Keep praying that God will lead you into a church you feel welcome in.  My church family is amazing!  Ask God to send someone to you, a new friend, that you could do things with.  I'm very close to God right now and I still feel lonely.  He is ALWAYS with us and sometimes it helps to spend some time with Him.  I pray that God will send someone to you.  That you will find a church family that helps you. 

>>Is it wrong to feel Lonely?

Some of us enjoy being by ourselves for long periods of time. So not everyone is effected by being without human interaction the same way, but I think is safe to say that we all get lonely here and there. It is normal to feel lonely at times and to long for interaction with others.


However feeling lonely all the time, which I understand is something you have not stated, but I would like to offer my opinion on it, would be wrong. It would be something that one would need to overcome with God's help.

I've heard others explaining that we can't trust our feelings, that feelings lie. I don't fully agree. I see feelings as being neither right, nor wrong. They just are and they actually are honest because they are what you are really feeling. What may be wrong is the reason why you are feeling the way you feel. Feelings are a form of knowledge that, if we follow them, we can get to the roots of what is really wrong. IMO, at least.

I spend a lot of time alone. I don't enjoy my time alone. It's just easier for me to be alone. There are more painful feelings and situations for me than loneliness. So I don't hate solitude. Being with people often makes me feel very exhausted and anxious.

The Lifehouse, Rocky Meadows and BJ Roberts (who used to attend our church):

God Cares How You Feel:

Good advice. Denying feelings never helps but often hurts.


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