We know it is wrong to steal, but children some times steal things. How do we handle it when we find our kids have been stealing? Now I have not dealt with this as a parent in a long time, and when I did deal with it, I did not do such a good job handling it. So lets hear from the experts out there. Moms, and Dad every where how do you handle it when you find out your child has been stealing Stuff?
Hi Marshall, God bless you!
I don't know if I did a good job with my daughter or not. My daughter stole a bunch of small things from a store. She wasn't that old, and it was the first time I had ever seen her do it. I took her back in and made her give it back and we paid for it. I told her that we don't steal. I also took her to Target and explained their security to her. How sometimes their employees watch for stealing. I explained that people get caught eventually, and I explained the consequences for stealing.
She never stole another thing that I can tell. Actually she gets mad if she sees other people stealing.
Mary Thanks for sharing this story. A lot of people take the kids back to the store. it seems to make a big point to them when they face people they have taking things from.
I've heard of parents taking this exact stand of taking them back in & embarrass them so bad as well as scare the stealing out of them that it usually works.
Hi Marshall, God bless you!
I've given it more thought. There's a Part 2 after the stealing. We began to give my daughter an allowance. She was a little kid, so we chose small chores that she could accomplish. We paid quarters or fifty cents. She learned to save, and she also learned to work and earn. We adjusted the chores and allowance as she got older. I think it works.
Also that everyone should eat and drink and take pleasure in all his toil—this is God's gift to man. (Ecclesiastes 3:13 ESV)
Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might, for there is no work or thought or knowledge or wisdom in Sheol, to which you are going. (Ecclesiastes 9:10 ESV)
Do not muzzle an ox while it is treading out the grain. (Deuteronomy 25:4 NIV) Meaning if the ox can nibble while it's working, it's happier and will work harder for you.
That's a good idea as well Mary O.
Well, I never stole anything nor my brother. So far, my children have not stole anything. One son I was legal guardian of stole some money out of my bank account. He wasn't living at home then & he & one of his hoodlums friends came to the house, stole my card & stole some money. My husband had went to talk to him & I was right behind him. He denied it with Tim but I knew he wouldn't lie to me. The way I handled it was I pulled up at the hood's house, called my son to me. He denied it a couple of times. I then looked at him & said "Look at me". I told him I already have called the bank & have proof it was taken from an ATM that was right down the road from me. If he didn't tell me truth, I would press charges on him & his loser friend. He got in the car & we talked. I drove off & went into a church parking lot. My husband called me & met me there. He said, "What we going to do?" I said I didn't know but I knew what I wanted to do but taking Justin into my home was more me although he did have to agree with it. It was my idea. I couldn't send him back home to his drug infested home that literally had dog boop all over the floors, cat boop on the counters, weeds were literally covering the house. It was incomprehensible how someone could live in this heap of trash & also raise a child in it. Beside the back porch was nothing but trash. It was as high as the porch which had about 6 steps. I'm not talking in bags, just trash. Beer cans, you name it. It smelled like so much urine I did all I could to keep a straight face when I went there. I went to check on him cause I had not heard from him in a few days & his grandmother called me to check on him. She gave me the address. See, Justin would have never allowed me to drive there. When I got there, I knocked a couple of times & then opened the door a little to holler. They came to the door & then hollered for him. They said Tammy is here. He would not answer them. He was so embarrassed. I then shouted, cause I wasn't walking in, that if he didn't come there, I'm coming in to get him - big dogs & all. A mother will walk thru fire for her babies. Anyways, I told him to get his clothes that he's coming home with me. I kinda sorta asked her permission & the man was the step-father so I didn't care what he said. But, I was taking my young'un home. She then signed him over to me. About the stealing situation, I wanted Tim to decide what to do cause I didn't want to be left being blamed for my decision. He looked at me & said, "I ain't leaving him here. Call him, tell him to get his clothes & we're going home." That's what we did in our situation. That is a different kind of situation cause he didn't steal from anyone else. But, we chose to love him thru it. Now, he's happily married of a couple of years, has a 3 year old step-daughter who I consider my granddaughter & they just had a little boy 2 weeks ago who of course I do consider my own. My first grandson
My parents caught my brother stealing something once, when he was 6. They made him go back to the store and admit that he had stolen it. He was terrified and embarrassed. To my knowledge he never stole another thing in his life.
When he was grown, he became a policeman and has always had high ethical standards in his work.