What If?

In these past weeks, I encountered different kinds of problems. Sometimes it makes me strong, sometimes its weight hides in me. It is compose of physical, emotional, spiritual and etc., different kind of problems but one solution, pray. But praying without work is dead. I always asked myself “what if?”, and somehow there’s always a part in my head telling me “you think too much”. I know myself than any other person, but still there’s some part of me I can’t understand. Having this kind of mind is really a hard time for me. There’s always a time when I’m alone, it speaks a lot. Being alone is a very difficult time for anyone, but by grace, He’s always with me. It’s like having two minds at the same time; at first I thought I’m crazy, but still it making me crazy. So, that’s why I’m really having a hard time now, and typing is all I can do to throw it away from my mind. Back to the topic, maybe I’m just really thinking too much, but what if it’s a sign or a warning? And there’s again the “what if”. Feeling something different is something that my mind can’t ignore, and seeing a different kind advertisement about it making my mind asking me “what if?”. I remember someone saying “We already have this, but it is just turned off.”, and only God can turn it on. Then God turned it on to me? Or He’s giving me a warning? A challenge I need to won? Or God is giving me something I need to learn?