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Considering our speech.

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listenEphesians 4.29  In other words, consider your speech—choose to speak words of life.

 “Oh I so want to speak words of life that you were writing about!  So often I think of good and right things to say … you know, kind things, but usually too late; it seems those are the things that seem to go unsaid.  And can you help me with thinking before I speak?” the mother from Virginia wrote.  “How can I learn to be more positive with my words?” another asked.

How to answer such questions … hmmm.  A great starting place is the realization that our words truly do build or tear down those we love, work alongside, coach or manage.  Next when we discern the desire to speak good and positive things, comes the sixty-four dollar question1:  how do we get control of our tongues?!

Not surprisingly, it is Jesus who informs our thinking:  “For the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart.”2Ah, and so it is.  Our words come out of who we are. . . out of who we are in our hearts and minds.  Whether we stop and think before we speak is our choice, as well as whether we even think about what we say at all! 

Probably a little stock-taking is in order here -- how’s your talk?  I mean, in the course of your day, you will speak thousands of words … what is the value of the content of your words?  Using Ephesians 4.29 as a litmus test, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouth” … how are you doing with that warning?  Does your line of conversation contain vulgarities, crude statements or those with no value?  Perhaps some thinking is in order.  And the latter part of the verse, “but only what is good for building others up …” Do your words bring value or benefit to another’s day? 

Second, once honest, most of us realize that we come up lacking—in one way or the other.  We miss opportunities to speak out affirmation in the workplace, while we may be too quick to criticize our teen-aged children.  I know that I want to somehow improve in this arena of positive communication … but, how?

Having come to the realization that I have a desire to move in that direction and also a felt need for it, I fully acknowledge the logic in the Scripture verse that says, ‘out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks’.  My tongue does not operate independent of my brain or emotions, but rather those two influence what comes out of my mouth.

So, Lord, I ask you, in recollection of the songs from my childhood, about ‘wonderful words of life,’ and ‘oh be careful little mouth what you say …’?  How can I be a woman who speaks with intention, and intentionally speaks that which is of benefit, or if not, a woman who chooses to be quiet? 

Lean into me, Child.  Come to me, seek me … for when you seek me with all of your heart, I will be found by you.3 The more of you that you surrender to me, the greater freedom the Holy Spirit has to transform you, and grow the fruits of the Spirit within you.  ‘Remember those?  The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness and self control.4

Lean into me, Child.  That’s where your thinking and your speech will be transformed … yes, that is where you should start.

 

Christine

 PastorWoman.com


 

1 Where did the expression $64 question originate?  1940s television quiz game shows.

2  Matthew 12.34

3 Jeremiah 29l.13

4 Galatians  5.22-23

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