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Shirley has a heart operation and sees God.  She says, "Is this IT?"  God says, "No, this is just a near-death experience.  You have at least 30 more years of life ahead of you!"  As Shirley recovers, she decides to make the most of her life and have reconstruction of the face, breast implants, collagen on the lips, tummy tuck and even have someone do her hair and nails, with a new set of clothes to boot.  On her last procedure, her teeth whitening, she walks out of hospital and gets struck by a truck, and is dead.  Up in Heaven, she is annoyed and challenges God.  "You said I had at least 30 years left and what happens, I get killed really early!"  God looks amazed.  "Shirley!  I didn't recognise you!"

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I got a good laugh off of that one. Really funny!!


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