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Letting GO of a thing in the past

I have been struggeling for the past 12 years to forgive myself for a wrongdoing aganst another person. For several years after it happened, I did not understand the concequences of my actions, but once I finally did, I have beat myself up nearly on a daily basis for it.
I have been seeing a councelor, and attending Church regularly, asking God to grant me serenity to accept that I can not change the past... but I still struggle with this one thing.
Yesterday when speaking with my councelor (she is not Christian, but speaks very frankly, and I feel that her intentions are good) she asked me "How much is enough? When will you have punished yourself enough to break free from this?" and it got me thinking....
I need spiritual guidance to finally let go of this past mistake. God has endowed me with gifts beyond measure when it comes to fixing things, but I feel that fixing myself is selfish, greedy, and at times that I'm just not worth fixing.
I know that I would be able to live a happier life, andn begin to TRUST others more if I could just LET GO of this one thing.
Could anyone suggest some scriptures to read and pray over, to help me find my value in the sight of the Lord? To help me find value within myself? I trust that God can fix anything we ask him to, and he will bring peace to those who need it AND ACCEPT IT. I just need help ACCEPTING this peace and love he has for me.

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Permalink Reply by Carla on February 19, 2008 at 12:20pm: Hi Dave,
First of all, Thank you for reaching out. God gives us eachother (the body of Christ) to strengthen and encourage eachother during the rough patches.

Author Joanna Weaver (Having a Mary Spirit) writes this "For there is nothing like adversity to reveal what we're made of. In fact. I'm convinced that trouble and stress are two of the most common ways God shows us the weakness of our flesh and the futulity of our self efforts. In His mercy, He often allows stress to build up until the weak areas in our lives begin to give way under pressure."

also...

"But God...We read that little phrase right before God intervenes in a situation, taking what Satan meant for evil and turning it for good. And God still intervenes today. But please note. While God may intervene, He doesn't necessarily interrupt. In fact, He may prolong the painful circumstances and injustice in order to work out His perfect purpose in our lives. He may allow us to experience the consesquenes of our sins in order to wean us from their deceptive embrace. For He is a wise Father, and He knows what we need. Even when we question His ways."

Dave i want to quote this entire chapter to you because the information is so good...obviously i can't do that, so i'll type some things that stood out for me.

"For Satan doesn't waste his fiery darts on just one person when he has the chance to ruin multiple lives. But be assured that God doesn't waste opportunities either. For he is the one who takes all things and works them together for the good of those who love him." -Romans 8:28

Psalm 139:5 You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head.

Joanna Weaver also says "No matter what we've done or what's been done to us, no matter how deep our wounds or how damaged our spirits, we have a Mighty God who is able to redeem our darkest moments and deepest fears. A loving Father who promises to keep watch at our points of vulnerability, to strengthen us where we're weak, to correct the lies that have led us astray, and to heal the rifts in our souls. BUT ONLY IF WE GIVE HIM ACCESS">......"As long as we deny our weakness, we'll never experience His strength"

Psalm 46:1-2
God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble. So we will not fear when the earthquakes come and the mountains crumble into the sea.

Read Romans 8:31-39. Nothing can separate us from God's Love

Read Hebrews 12. God's Discipline Proves His Love.--i really like Hebrews 12:12.
I also love Hebrews 12:5-7.

Hebrews 12: 14-15. Meditate and pray for understanding on this. 'root of bitterness'

Pray psalm 140:23-24. Make sure you are ready for it. God is faithful in responding.

Proverbs 13:24--Those who spare the rod of discipline hate their children. Those who love their children care enough to discipline them.

Luke 12:6 What is the price of five sparrows--two copper coins? Yet God does not forget a single one of them. And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don't be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows"

1 John 4 9-10 God showed how much he loved us by sending his one and only Son into the world so that we might have eternal life through Him. This is real love--not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent His Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.

1 John 4 7-21. Loving one another---read this

Dave, This is a lot of information to take in. But take heart, God Loves You!
Truly we are all going through tough times in this fallen world, as we are all sinners saved by God's Grace. Your sister in Christ, Carla; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Dave on February 19, 2008 at 10:29pm: Thanks so much!
I am actually printing this out so I may read and bookmark the passages you have suggested for me to read!

I have been praying for God to grant me the peace to finally let go of this hostility I have towards myself, and I felt drawn to read the bible. Well I am begining a study group on Romans this Saturday, and I hadn't been invited to the first session, so I was reading up on what I missed... and continued reading. When I got to Chapter 2 Verses 1 thru 4 I realised... Who am I to judge myself? That is God's job, not mine! Since I know he has already forgiven this sin, I need to just let go.
I had a fairly good day today, which is completely unusual for me since my wife left me. I really do feel that God is working things out for me.
Thank you for your support, Truely appreciated!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Bob B on February 19, 2008 at 6:03pm: I just saw a message on Lifechurch.tv that was called Hostage that was amazing.
go to lifechurch.tv select a category, message series, hostag 2-18-08; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by jhaz on February 20, 2008 at 7:30am: I understand your situation. Being in a point in time where you think that you cannot forgive yourself, that's why your conscience kills you. Anyway, God is really a loving Father,, He forgives you when you repent and ask Him for forgiveness. No matter how big your sins and mistakes are, it doesnt matter. Go knows your heart. Just make a sincere change in your ways of living.. and God will surely bless you. Accept Him as you Savoir, God and a Friend. God is powerful that nobody can take away His love form us.

Your very precious to Him, just trust in His power and always pray for His forgiveness to your sins. No body is perfect right?. but God will make His people worthy through His grace and mercy.. Take note of that my friend,, through His mercy and not by our own strength.. God bless.

~Jesus is the way, the truth and the Life~; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Rick on February 20, 2008 at 8:04am: Christian, how long wll you continue to deny Christ's sacrifice? Sound pretty harsh? Well, its time everyone stops enabling you to wollow in self-pity and tell you the truth. Christ died so we, you and me, can one day stand before the Father in confidence knowing that Christ covered our sin with His blood. Unless you let this thing go and quit beating yourself with it, you might just as well thumb your nose at God an go on your way because you are denying Him the thing He wants most from you, your love, obedience, and respect for His sacrifice. You are allowing the devil to have place in your life and you know where that will lead you. Maranatha!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Dave on February 20, 2008 at 8:36am: I have made the decision to move on from this. I have asked God for forgiveness, and I trust that through Jesus I have been forgiven! Your statement here was truely moving. I have asked God for the peace and strength that I need to keep the devil out, and to cast him away when he brings thes things into me.
It is not a one moment here, next moment gone thing. It will take prayer and work to truely forgive myself for this wrong doing. But through prayer and councel from fellow Christians like you, I am beginning to find peace!
Thank you all for all your help!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Rick on February 20, 2008 at 8:46am: Good for you! God's love surpasses our ability to forgive others AND ourselves. I wish you peace brother. Rick; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Dave on February 20, 2008 at 11:43am: What I am finding most amazing about God's Glory, is we can draw inspiriation even from the most unlikely of sources. I heard a song by a totally non-christian rock group, that usually sings about self loathing, breakups, and hate.... But for some reason, they have a song that is nothing of the above at all. It is about letting go of the past, and forgiving ones self. I think that even tho they are a non christian band, this song can be inspiring to all who are holding on to something that they need to let go of.
Linkin Park What I've Done Lyrics

In this farewell
There’s no blood
There’s no alibi
‘Cause I’ve drawn regret
From the truth
Of a thousand lies

[Pre-Chorus:]
So let mercy come
And wash away
What I’ve done

[Chorus:]
I'll face myself
To cross out what i’ve become
Erase myself
And let go of what i’ve done

Put to rest
What you thought of me
While I clean this slate
With the hands of uncertainty

[Pre-Chorus]

[Chorus]

For what I’ve done
I start again
And whatever pain may come
Today this ends
I’m forgiving what I’ve done!!!

[Chorus]

What I’ve done
Forgiving what I’ve done
__________________
This is only possible with God's guidance, and not all the lyrics are very Christian, but the message of forgiving ones self for what they have done, and to head down a new path is powerful. As long as the path chosen is the one that leads you closer to God, then GO!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Rori on February 20, 2008 at 1:43pm: VERY COOL.......Thanks; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Bob B on February 28, 2008 at 6:24am: Some one said,' we should leave the past in the past and not bring it into the present'. Well it might sound good, but it is not an easy thing to do. Some people deal with thier past by denial; it doesn't work either. I believe that the blood of Jesus washes away all unrightiousness, what we have done and what others have done to us. God wants us to live abundant lives for Him therefore we need to seek to be free by laying aside the weight theis hindering us to run the race of life that is set before us.; ▶ Reply to This