Lisen along here:  https://www.pastorwoman.net/podcast/episode/f7beaec9/rucksacks-what-is-and-what-is-not-to-be-in-yours

Have you ever determined to be happy 

  or to be positive, 

    to stop worrying . . . 

      to live in a state of gratitude

        or possibly to be contented,

          to only say good things . . . 

             but you just couldn't break through?

      Maybe there is a reason.

Several few years ago, I was even more into fitness than I am now. Several times a week, I taught grueling 30-minute 'abs' classes. The classes were in high demand at two different gyms in my Northern California town. We did nothing but sit-ups and every conceivable derivation thereof to strengthen and define the abdominal muscles.  

Weight lifters and body builders would come, take off their belts, and hit the mat. One of my faithful attendees was Tom, an army vet who lived off his pension, and worked out all day long.  At 39 years of age, 6 ft., 6 in. Tom was quite a physical specimen--202 pounds, and just two percent body fat...yes, 2 %.  'You get the idea?  He was ripped. One of his training routines was running down the beach, dragging a 75-pound rucksack in the sand to challenge and strengthen his body, work his core, his quadriceps and so on.  What an image!  It was hard work and a lot of strain on Tom to run fast with that dragging behind him, but that was the idea. 

But here's the thing--our personal lives--our hearts, minds

and emotions are not meant to be like that.

In the past week, I have had several conversations with people who are dragging rucksacks of different sorts. This morning at a women's small group at church, a new friend made reference to the things she has to regularly remind herself about who God says she is. She made reference to the mental 'overrides' she has to do on a regular basis, so as not to be defeated in her daily life.

Undoubtedly, the contents of our rucksacks vary-

while mine might contain worry or anxiety,

yours might be filled with shame, regret or guilt;

still another person packs around envy and bitterness.

Then, of course, there is past pain and unrealized dreams.

How about a broken heart, or something else? 

Friend, I'm wondering what your life would be like if you weren't dragging around that rucksack, but instead, cut the ropes and surrendered the weight to God. 

Hmmm.... how to do that.

Picture the rucksack - take it off your back, put it on the floor in front of you. Let's pull the crud out of our rucksacks, and expose it to the light; let's name it.  

Shame, regret, bitterness, anger, heartache, envy, jealousy ... addiction?

What dogs you? The things in your rucksack are robbing you of many great things on a daily basis.

I once did this with some friends at the beach. But first, I distributed paper and pens; they took a 30-minute walk to ask God 'what else' they were dragging around, and they wrote those things down. Made notes how they got there, how long it had been, what it would feel like to be free. [hey, friend - grab a journal or notebook paper--this is a valuable activity!]

When we re-gathered, I led them in a prayer something like this:

'God, you know all about me. You know the things that weigh me down--in some ways, define me. Today I identified those things, God, finally getting real and honest. I don't want to carry them around anymore, battling them in my mind, so I am going to surrender them to you; today, I am going to let go of all the yuck that has weighed me down. Continue to heal my broken thoughts and emotions. Remind me to do this every time I start down the wrong path in my mind!

God, you gave us Jesus so we could be free from sin, shame, regret...all the things. So would you shine your light on these areas that have crippled and caused me pain? Would you take them from me? I do not want to hide from you - oh brother, as though I could! Make me new, God! Amen.'

When people looked up, their facial expressions were telling--there was hope.

Often we hide from God precisely those places in ourselves where we feel shamed, confused, and lost.  Thus we do not give him a chance to be with us where we feel most alone,1 or a chance to restore us.

Jesus said, I have come in order that you might have life—life in all its fullness.2 Let's not settle for something far less.

Here are some simple words of David you might make your own and pray:

Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.3

So let's empty our rucksacks of what is not meant to be in them . . . get rid of those things that weigh us down. Give them to the One who can do something about them. Amen.

Listen! This is by my friend, Melody Noel, Make Me New -

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sAVjnrgBjY4&list=RDsAVjnrgBjY4&start_radio=1

Christine

PastorWoman.net

1   Henri Nouwen, "Gracias", 1983

2 - John 10.10

3 - Psalm 51.10, King James Version