Separated, Divorced, or loss of a spouse support net. Discussions - All About GOD2024-03-29T00:02:35Zhttp://www.allaboutgod.net/group/SeparatedorDivorcedsupportnet/forum?groupUrl=SeparatedorDivorcedsupportnet&feed=yes&xn_auth=noLiving in fear and trying to do God's willtag:www.allaboutgod.net,2013-06-29:1383940:Topic:14723462013-06-29T12:45:22.085ZJay David Simshttp://www.allaboutgod.net/profile/JayDavidSims
<p>I am recently separated as well. I was a heavy drinker. In may, I put myself into a treatment center. I had reached a level of deep shame. I was verbally abusive and a very angry drunk. I often was hard on her children, my step-children. This in itself really hurt her. I''m sure I frightened our little daughter as well, who is 4 yrs old. </p>
<p>My wife left while I was in treatment. I didn't see it coming at all. I was blown away coming home to a house without my family (I also have sons…</p>
<p>I am recently separated as well. I was a heavy drinker. In may, I put myself into a treatment center. I had reached a level of deep shame. I was verbally abusive and a very angry drunk. I often was hard on her children, my step-children. This in itself really hurt her. I''m sure I frightened our little daughter as well, who is 4 yrs old. </p>
<p>My wife left while I was in treatment. I didn't see it coming at all. I was blown away coming home to a house without my family (I also have sons who visit on weekends, and she has an older son who lives at his own place) I cannot even describe the fear that rips at me. I think that if she had finalized our marriage, as in telling me that it's absolutely over, I could begin to try to heal. But she says that there may be hope. She won't say much more than that however. I want our marriage. I believe that God hates divorce. I believe that by God's hand our marriage can heal and be stronger than ever. I go to God daily, sometimes ten times daily in prayer and petition. She is the only woman I have ever truly loved, and I deeply love all of our children. It is impossible to help her understand the mind of an alcoholic and that I never wanted to hurt her or our children as I did. I was trapped in a deeply selfish and sick frame of mind, sober and drunk. I ask God to claim back our marriage...that he hurt be healed, and that my addiction be kept at bay. I stand on the Rock of Jesus' grace and forgiveness for what I had become in my addiction, and make my claim as a deserving husband and father. I am sober now and active in recovery circles and my church, for my own good as much as my family's. My wife is in counselling to try to understand and work through how she feels (she feels betrayed by an alcoholic husband who's quit before and went back at the bottle) </p>
<p>All said, the fear grips me daily. I can't push her into a decision. I do see my children twice weekly, and that is a blessing. I try to keep conversations with my wife light and friendly. (we talk daily, and she usually calls me first) I also ask God to grant me strength to do His will regardless of the outcome of my marriage. This is all well and good to talk about...but living it is a daily painful battle. Fear like I have never known.</p> God Will... Bring you Thru.tag:www.allaboutgod.net,2011-03-06:1383940:Topic:8985442011-03-06T16:58:58.112ZGaylahttp://www.allaboutgod.net/profile/Gayla
As someone who has gone thru many struggles in life, oftentimes longing for the end of a certain situation that I was experiencing at the moment, I can say of a surety that "God... will bring you thru. "<br />
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It may not be the way you want, or expect, but, when we come to him, we have to learn how to trust him, even when there appears no way out of our situation. He is working in the background, and of that, we can be sure.<br />
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He loves us with a love that is stronger than death, and his word…
As someone who has gone thru many struggles in life, oftentimes longing for the end of a certain situation that I was experiencing at the moment, I can say of a surety that "God... will bring you thru. "<br />
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It may not be the way you want, or expect, but, when we come to him, we have to learn how to trust him, even when there appears no way out of our situation. He is working in the background, and of that, we can be sure.<br />
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He loves us with a love that is stronger than death, and his word declares that "NOTHING CAN SEPERATE US FROM HIS LOVE." His word is true, and it works. His spirit is true, and it works as well, in our hearts and lives, and in our circumstances. It is our job to trust, believe and obey.<br />
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Talk to him , as if he is your best friend, because he is. Truly. Amazingly, and always. "He will never leave us nor forsake us, and is with us, even unto death. "<br />
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He can and will support you in any situation that you find yourself, whether good or bad. He is never out of control, and he has the entire universe at his disposal.<br />
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When he created us, he said... "It is good.... "<br />
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Sin and disobedience entered, and things began to go wrong. He has been working ever since to bring us back to that place of trust, and obedience to his will, his way, his word, and his spirit.<br />
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The more we resist, the longer it takes. He is on our side, he cares about what we are going thru. He has a plan for our deliverance. It is not a magic plan, that works when one snaps their fingers, it is a plan for our complete salvation, he is concerned about the condition of our souls, and how we relate to each other, and the world around us.<br />
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He has designed us to be his witness, to an unbelieving world, and everything that we say or do, has an impact upon that world. Whether we are dealing with our family, or our neighbors, or the cashier in the food store, we are making an impact daily, whether good or bad. The choise is always up to us.<br />
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Many of us have come from very unsteady backgrounds, we have not been blessed with stable environments, with loving, nurturing parents, and life partners. This creates within us and unstability, that is harder to overcome, but, not impossible.<br />
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When we come to God, we have come to the best parent in the world, one who loves us unconditionally, and always has our best interest at heart. However, because he loves us it is not his will that we remain the same. He is constantly working to change and transform the way we think and operate in this fallen world. It is his desire to make us overcomers, and victorious in all circumstances.<br />
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He can and will do this, but, he needs our cooperation. He needs us to read his word, so tath he can talk to us from it, he uses it, to help transform us, into the person he intends for us to be. He can and does speak to us thru circumstances as well, and many other ways, but, he will never go against his word. It is his standard, and by reading it, we can come to know who he is.<br />
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Many times we will fall on our faces, but, he is always there to pick us up, and dust us off, and set us back on the right path. We must continue to look toward him. If we take our eyes off of him, we begin to fall, just like Peter did, when he was walking on water. It amazed him so much that he could do this..... but, when he looked at it from a human persepective, one that says, what he was doing was impossible... he started going down, because he was no longer in the supernatural, but, back into the natural, with its laws of gravity that he was defying. There is a huge lesson to be learned from this story. Read it over and over again, until it sinks deep into your spirit, giving you the strength that you need to walk on the waters of your life. Training your thoughts and mind to remain steadfast upon the Master, on his word, and in his spirit.<br />
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He wants each of us to become "Water Walkers...."<br />
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I love you and God loves you more!!!!!! Be blessed in Him. Gayla Stahl Going through Divorced :-(tag:www.allaboutgod.net,2011-02-08:1383940:Topic:8729192011-02-08T14:48:44.496ZVicky Emperatriz Diazhttp://www.allaboutgod.net/profile/VickyEmperatrizDiaz
My husband of 18 1/2 years walked out on me and my girls. It has been very painful to me as his wife but also as the mother of our children because I get to see the pain and rebellion they are going through right now. About 4 years ago he had an affair with a soldier of his and out of the affair she became pregnant. He chose to leave with her. He played with my emotions for the first 2 years while I kept asking him that we could work things out. He would say yes and then get even closer to his…
My husband of 18 1/2 years walked out on me and my girls. It has been very painful to me as his wife but also as the mother of our children because I get to see the pain and rebellion they are going through right now. About 4 years ago he had an affair with a soldier of his and out of the affair she became pregnant. He chose to leave with her. He played with my emotions for the first 2 years while I kept asking him that we could work things out. He would say yes and then get even closer to his girlfriend. I finally gave up and have since been waiting for the divorce. Last year he deployed and when he came back on R&R he bought a house for them. I told him if you plan to live with her you need to give me the divorce because what are you teaching your kids. Well I am assuming he thought he was going to have his cake and eat it too because he kept ignoring me. When he got back he actually put in the paperwork and he moved in with her doesn't even acknowledge I exist. He still pays for bills but since they just got their house I feel that things will change financially and me and our kids are the ones that will be affected the most. He won't meet with me to discuss the paperwork and a lawyer I spoke to said if he agrees to what you want then it will be a simple divorce (money wise I guess) I really have no money to keep paying a lawyer everytime he disagrees with something. I am frustrated because it was his choice to leave. The only good thing that came out of it is that I got closer to GOD and I joined this website because I really need christians who are going throught the same to guide me spiritually and be there for me because I feel weak right now. His family has accepted his girlfriend and child and now me the wife and my kids are getting the cold shoulder. I knew things would change I just had no idea it would hurt this much. Please keep me and my 5 girls in your prayers. I am having a hard time I guess understanding how can someone walk away after so many years without even looking back as though it never mattered. I am hurting really bad right now. I know GOD is in control and HE alone is in charge. I understand this it's just that the pain sometimes out weights what I know it's true. Now what?tag:www.allaboutgod.net,2011-02-03:1383940:Topic:8670922011-02-03T11:16:28.604ZStephen Sadouskyhttp://www.allaboutgod.net/profile/StephenSadousky
I'll put this out there to see what is what.Not really sure what happens now,but ,I guess that sometimes things have to end so new beginnings can start.I find myself facing divorce,and have been separated for 6 years now.I did not see it coming,and was shocked to the point that I still have twinges in my heart about it all.It's a very long story,but I'll try to keep it as short as possible.I married a women who had three daughters age's 1and a half,7,and 12,in1996,bought a house, had a great…
I'll put this out there to see what is what.Not really sure what happens now,but ,I guess that sometimes things have to end so new beginnings can start.I find myself facing divorce,and have been separated for 6 years now.I did not see it coming,and was shocked to the point that I still have twinges in my heart about it all.It's a very long story,but I'll try to keep it as short as possible.I married a women who had three daughters age's 1and a half,7,and 12,in1996,bought a house, had a great job,and was feeling so great about life that my world was always filled with smiles!We had our problems,but nothing lasted that long that we would not get over it.My walk with the Lord was not so good,and I started to try to go back to church,but it never really lasted that long,and looking back I could see that to be a real big problem in much of this.My wife was and still not saved,as well as our kids.But what happened is still so bizarre ,that at times I'm beside myself with doubt about the whole thing.My wife was always into strange religious beliefs ,mostly Native American ,spirit animals,Katina dolls,she had a medicine bag which she kept things in,etc. I knew all this was wrong,but when you love someone,you just love someone.I know that God was showing me these things for a reason,but didn't care ,I wanted what I wanted,and did it my way.After about 6 years,the weirdness got even weirder ,One day I went to go install a roof on a house with a friend of mine,and when I pulled up in the driveway,on the bumper of the car there was a sticker that said,"something wiccan this way comes".I sat there for a min.knowing what it meant,but ,money being money,decided let me just do it and go home.I met the women who owned the house ,and she started talking about spell casting for rain and things like that,how she had horses she kept at a local barn,just regular talk,but I did not even see what was going on,My youngest daughter had started to take riding lessons at the barn where this women kept her horses,but I had know way of even knowing that.About 3-4 days later,my wife came home from the barn and asked If the roof I did was for a woman named Donna,I said yes,and she said ,I know her,what a small world.After sometime,I really just forgot about all of it.But then my wife started to work at the barn in exchange for free riding lessons for our daughter,and they would be away from the house more and more.One day I went there to hang out with my family,and saw this woman Donna.I found out that my wife was giving shots to horses and doing vet work there, I said not a good idea ,you don't have a license to do this,Donna jumped right in and said "Its ok,we are sisters of the earth,you don't understand,we are medicine women".I just walked away,when my wife got home,she was never the same again.I went back to the barn a short time later and ask my wife if she still loves me.She said she didn't know.It all went down hill from there.We separated soon after that,and nothing has been the same.Our oldest daughter moved out to live with her boyfriend,our middle daughter got a tattoo of the goddess lilith on her ankle,and now my wife reads tarot cards and does reike,and she has taught our youngest daughter the dark arts as well.The church that I started to attend knows the basics of the story,and I told them that I would have very strange things happening to me ,bad health,money problems,on of course all this with the divorce.Two of the elders prayed over me with some friends,and when they were done praying ,one elder said to me that satan was showing me his army. I grew up next door to real satan worshippers ,and I mean real!No joke about any of this.The elder said that basically these people have been in my path all of my life for some reason,and know one knows why,myself included.I pray for my wife every day as well as the kids,for there salvation,and for God to deliver them from all of this.We are not divorced yet ,it's hard to track my wife down,and the girls have abandoned me as well.I have had no contact with any of them in over 2 years.I'm not really sure what all of this means,I do still love my wife very much,and the pain in my heart is very hard to deal with at times,Maybe someone can get something out of all of this,maybe not.All I know is that the choises that we make in life without Gods wise counsel are chioses we have to live with.But I do know that he helps me daily in my walk with him,and I will get through all of this.Anyone reading this I ask that you just say a prayer for my girls and there mother for God to deliver them from all this,before it's to late....In Christ,steve Need your prayers. I'm just so angry.tag:www.allaboutgod.net,2010-08-02:1383940:Topic:6927022010-08-02T14:05:09.527ZLeohttp://www.allaboutgod.net/profile/Leo251
Yesterday, I had to take my boys back to their moms and I won't get to see them for like 5 or 6 months. I am not an angry person but this has just done it to me. I am so angry at my wife for doing this. I am just so disgusted and upset. I've never thought I could feel emotions like this in my life. I know it is not what God wants for me to feel. She called to see if I was ok and I was not very nice. To me it seemed like she was just trying to make herself feel better and not feel guilty about…
Yesterday, I had to take my boys back to their moms and I won't get to see them for like 5 or 6 months. I am not an angry person but this has just done it to me. I am so angry at my wife for doing this. I am just so disgusted and upset. I've never thought I could feel emotions like this in my life. I know it is not what God wants for me to feel. She called to see if I was ok and I was not very nice. To me it seemed like she was just trying to make herself feel better and not feel guilty about it. I believe it more so because she called me three times to ask me why I was so upset. Please pray for me. <br/><br/>I feel like that was the line and she crossed it. I've put up with so much and done so much for her. I've been praying for reconciliation and reunification of our marriage but this, this has completely changed my mind. I know that is not what God wants from me. Pray that God give me the love to show her because there is none left in me. <br/><br/>Please pray for my boys because I know they are probably scared and don't understand all these changes. Lord please shield them from all this negative feelings and bless them. <br/> Been about 4 months since my wife filed for separation/divorcetag:www.allaboutgod.net,2010-07-13:1383940:Topic:6688472010-07-13T15:03:01.660ZLeohttp://www.allaboutgod.net/profile/Leo251
<p>We have had our rough times and had some good times. We have three of the biggest blessings God can betstow on us, three beautiful boys. We got married young but decided we'd tackle life together and enjoy its blessings. Yet, times got rough and I know I did things that hurt her and called her names I shouldn't have. I wanted to hang out with the guys and I would leave her at home with the boys. She would let me go out whenever I wanted and I never considered what she wanted to do. She…</p>
<p>We have had our rough times and had some good times. We have three of the biggest blessings God can betstow on us, three beautiful boys. We got married young but decided we'd tackle life together and enjoy its blessings. Yet, times got rough and I know I did things that hurt her and called her names I shouldn't have. I wanted to hang out with the guys and I would leave her at home with the boys. She would let me go out whenever I wanted and I never considered what she wanted to do. She became angry because she wanted a life outside of the house and once the opportunity came to get a job she took it and never looked back. A few years went by and a couple moves between states and I thought we had finally "made it". We had a decent house, car and food to eat. The only thing missing was my wife. I feel like she wanted to spend more time at work than at home with the boys and me. It felt like I was the only one doing things for the boys. I talked to her and asked her if she could cut back on the hours and she didnt like that one bit. She started getting calls/text messages from her boss more often. I got the phone bill and realized it was at all times of the night. I later found they had both been waiting up real late at night to talk to each other on the internet. I confronted her about it and she told me everything. They had done other things as well and they loved each other. I asked her if this was what she wanted for our family and she took a few days to think it over. She ended it with this other guy and we decided to move to her hometown so she could have the support she needed and so we could go to marriage counseling. We went to two sessions and she got a job and did not look back.</p>
<p>I became a stay at home dad and went to school. I really wanted a job and wanted to provide for my family but due to the size of the town the jobs were limited and the amount paid in childcare would equal my salary alone. She got promoted and we moved to another town. I feel like she became extremely engulfed in her work and didn't want to be at home with us. It made me very sad. She started working longer and longer hours and I told her how i felt and that I wanted to work. She wasn't happy about it and told me all I did was complain and bring her down. She told me wanted to file for a divorce and that we needed a break. I went out and sought God and I bought the love dare and the love and respect book. I read them diligently and implemented many of the things into my life and sought forgiveness for anything I had done. Things really turned around and I thought everything was going great. Then she went off to an overnight manager meeting and she was different. I saw her texting this other manager more and more and calling him even when she wasn't at work. It got to the point where she would hide in the bathroom to text/talk to him at home. I confronted him and her and I thought everything had mellowed down. I really wanted to believe it was just for work but I don't know. a month later she asked me for a divorce and took our boys to her moms house, she got rid of our house and took everything. I was left with nothing and went back to my home state to live with my parents.</p>
<p>The reason for all of this that she has given me is that she loves me but is not in love with me. I don't understand. I talk to her about maybe going to marriage counseling and she is very firm in saying that she doesn't want to be with me anymore but would like for me to be a part of our childrens lives. I have been trying my best to stay faithful to God and our marriage. I have hope that one day our family will be back together again but everytime I have hope she breaks it down again. I am so sad if this is truly the result she wants. I can only think of all the things I am going to miss out of because she feels like this. The pain is so heavy and I have done my best to give it all to God but it comes everyday. Pray for me because it feels like I'm coming to a fork in the road and my human nature wants to go down it but my mind and spirit tell me to go the other. This inner struggle is so hard. Please pray for me. I know who I used to be and I dont want to be like that ever again. I am a new creation in God. Lord see your servant and guide his path. Amen</p> Newly Divorcedtag:www.allaboutgod.net,2010-07-08:1383940:Topic:6642222010-07-08T13:33:46.480ZTeresahttp://www.allaboutgod.net/profile/Teresa279
<p>I'm newly divorced and it sucks. My husband wanted the divorce, said he wasnt happy, that I was mean to him and had a bad attitude. There were some other issues as well. We moved to Hawaii last summer for his job and I had a terrible time adjusting. This move didn't cause our problems, but it didn't help either. He did not want to go to counseling or try to work things out because he thought it was too little too late. I've since moved out of Hawaii back to my home state and I'm…</p>
<p>I'm newly divorced and it sucks. My husband wanted the divorce, said he wasnt happy, that I was mean to him and had a bad attitude. There were some other issues as well. We moved to Hawaii last summer for his job and I had a terrible time adjusting. This move didn't cause our problems, but it didn't help either. He did not want to go to counseling or try to work things out because he thought it was too little too late. I've since moved out of Hawaii back to my home state and I'm trying to figure out the next steps of life. How do I get out of this guilt and self blame phase that I am in. I know he is at fault too, but all I can see is my fault. </p>
<p>I'm just so devastated, at least the rawness of this pain is gone, but I just feel empty and that I failed in my role as a wife. :(</p> I'd be drowning by now if it wasn't for God picking me up and carrying me.tag:www.allaboutgod.net,2010-06-29:1383940:Topic:6550552010-06-29T22:02:46.064ZJames Saldanahttp://www.allaboutgod.net/profile/JamesSaldana
<p>My wife said she wants a divorce. I know that i have failed to show her how much she has meant to me after 17 years of marriage a lot of the times. i know that i have not been the husband to her and the father to my kids that God has instructed me to be. i am a Christian but have slid on my responsibilities to God and to my family. My wife said that she is "done" with our marriage. That she has felt this way for a long time. She also said that her heart was harddened to me and that nothing i…</p>
<p>My wife said she wants a divorce. I know that i have failed to show her how much she has meant to me after 17 years of marriage a lot of the times. i know that i have not been the husband to her and the father to my kids that God has instructed me to be. i am a Christian but have slid on my responsibilities to God and to my family. My wife said that she is "done" with our marriage. That she has felt this way for a long time. She also said that her heart was harddened to me and that nothing i could say or do would change that. i tried to get her to talk to our pastor with me to save our marriage. She went once with me but has not went back with me since. she has this worldly friend that is telling her to divorce me and find someone better. i felt that her friend was a wedge between us and when i asked her to choose her friend or my feelings she chose the friend. i felt so lost then i prayed to God for help. every day i have read His Word and prayed for His help and guidance. He showed me where i have failed in the marriage He blessed me with. i now pray that He will soften her heart so that i may show her how much i truly love what God has given me.</p>
<p>To be honest i have never felt so bad and good at the same time. the bad is my wife is not giving me any chance to prove myself to her, the good that my relationship with God in the fact that i have never felt closer to Him than i do now.</p>
<p>i always seem to ask Him why is this happening to me, and then yesterday when i talked to an old friend of mine about what i was going through, he informed me that he is struggling in his marriage now. So instead of feeling sorry for myself, i was able to tell him how God was working in my life.</p>
<p>i felt wonderful that maybe my testimony would help him save his marriage from what i'm going through.</p>
<p>that's when it hit me, that God was using me to help my friend.</p>
<p>My wife believes in God and has accepted Him as her savior in Jesus. i just feel that she was/is making wrong decisions when it came to her friend. But it came from me who at the time was not listening to God daily in my life.</p>
<p>So now i pray, thanking God for this opportunity to help others if that is His will for me. But i'm still so heartbroken that my wife is divorcing me and won't even try to forgive me.</p>
<p>So i was wondering if anyone had advice, i know God can change her heart if that is His will. He did it to me, so i know He hears my prayers and that whatever happens that He will be first in my life.</p>
<p>I am trying to show my wife how much i love and need her without trying to seem needy and pushy. i'm trying to give her space to listen to God but i don't see her asking Him for help. what i do see is that she is on the phone with her friend planning on her divorce of me.</p>
<p>what do i do? i feel His love and forgiveness but i feel so alone in my home.</p> How to have faithtag:www.allaboutgod.net,2010-02-18:1383940:Topic:5703352010-02-18T15:11:23.447ZJohnhttp://www.allaboutgod.net/profile/John184
Well spilling my personal stuff is always a challenge for me<br></br><br></br>My wife of 28 years left me about 1 year ago<br></br><br></br>About 3 months ago our divorce was final<br></br><br></br>I interact with her often (we still have 1 minor child) but our interactions are more than the minimum needed for the children<br></br><br></br>I cherish the moments we spend together and have told her <br></br><br></br>I believe that God will provide for me and i trust in him but now here is my dilemma I am constantly trying to fix our…
Well spilling my personal stuff is always a challenge for me<br/><br/>My wife of 28 years left me about 1 year ago<br/><br/>About 3 months ago our divorce was final<br/><br/>I interact with her often (we still have 1 minor child) but our interactions are more than the minimum needed for the children<br/><br/>I cherish the moments we spend together and have told her <br/><br/>I believe that God will provide for me and i trust in him but now here is my dilemma I am constantly trying to fix our relationship I know that i need to release her from myself but I am so weak and scared.<br/><br/>I pray alot and get peace from God but then off i go again<br/><br/>I am so tired of the pain<br/><br/>I am active with the church and other organizations<br/><br/>I know i am seeking an easy answer to a complex problem but it actually feels good just to write it out<br/><br/>If you can help me with any encouraging words i will be ever so grateful<br/><br/>Thank you all and God bless everyone<br/>John<br/><br/> <br/> DEALING WITH OFFENSES“tag:www.allaboutgod.net,2010-02-15:1383940:Topic:5679582010-02-15T12:57:15.047ZPastor Bob Bhttp://www.allaboutgod.net/profile/BobBushman
<div><p style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium;"><br></br></span></p>
<p style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium;"><u><b>DEALING WITH…</b></u></span></p>
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<div><p style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium;"><br/></span></p>
<p style="margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium;"><u><b>DEALING WITH OFFENSES</b></u><b>“</b></span></p>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium;"><br/><u><b>DEALING WITH OFFENSES</b></u>“<br/><br/><i>An offended brother is more [resistant]than a strong city, and disputes are like the locked gate of a castle tower.” ( Proverbs 18:19 GWT )<br/>And herein do I exercise myself, to have always a conscience void to offense toward God, and toward men.” ( Acts 24:16 KJV )<br/>“That ye may approve things that are excellent; that ye may be sincere and without offense till the day of Christ.” ( Philippians 1:10 )<br/>Then said he unto the disciples, It is impossible but that offenses will come: but woe unto him, through whom they come!” ( Luke 17:1 )</i><br/><br/>As we can see in these verses, we might as well brace up ourselves for offenses and learn how to deal with them, because they will come our way.<br/><br/><u><b>Definition of offense</b></u><br/>Let me first define the word ‘offense’. In the Hebrew, it means; obstacle, enticement, stumbling block, etc. In the Greek, it also means,; a trap stick, a snare, a cause of displeasure or sin, or a occasion to fall.<br/>It is a wounding of the feelings, annoyance or resentment caused by some ones actions or words.<br/><br/><u><b>Jesus Christ a rock of offense to many.</b></u><br/><i>“He will be a sanctuary, but a stone of stumbling and a rock of offense to both the houses of Israel, as a trap and a snare to the inhabitants of Jerusalem. And many among them shall stumble; they shall fall and be broken, be snared and taken.” (Isa.8:14, 15).</i><br/><br/><u><b>Do you know how many are offended in Jesus today?</b></u><br/>Many are disappointed in Him and a lot of things that seem inexplicable are blamed on Him. And we are not only talking about unbelievers, but sad to say, believers too!<br/><br/>1-People were also offended at the teachings of Jesus. (John.6:48-68).<br/>2-People were offended at Jesus in His home town because they knew Him too well in the natural to accept his claim to divinity. (Matt.13:54-57).<br/>3-The cross of Christ was also an offense to people. (Galatians 5:11).<br/>4-Some folks also are offended when tribulation and persecution arise because of the Word. (Matthew13:21).<br/>5-Jesus warned His disciples on the night of His arrest, that they would all be made to stumble because of Him. ( Matthew 26:31)<br/><br/>We are going to have to come to realize that just by being a follower of Jesus will cause others to become offended by us. This is so hard to deal with when it is your own family that is offended.<br/><br/><u><b>The opportunity for us of becoming offended</b></u><br/>We are presented with many opportunities to get offended each and every day. We will need to keep short accounts with ourselves to make sure that we have not gotten offended . For me Communion is a great time to do an inventory of my own heart to make sure that I am free of any kind of offenses.<br/><br/><u><b>Prayer is an essential element to keep these offenses from rooting in our lives.</b></u><br/>The Holy Spirit is a help in our lives and will show us if any offenses are taking up residence in us.<br/><br/>Know the Devil will present to us a variety of things to temp us down this path.<br/>Some one disappoints us,<br/>some one breaks a promise to us,<br/>some one neglects to do something for us,<br/>the list goes on and on.....<br/><br/>We will have to deal with this every day of our lives, and exercise of conscience to be void of offense by constantly being in prayer. Instead of becoming offended and getting ticked off, just begin to pray for the offender. I have found it very difficult to stay offended by some one I am praying for.<br/><br/>We were all an offense to God because of our sin condition before Jesus took our offenses and sin upon himself and the blood cleansed us from all unrighteousness.<br/><br/><u><b>Prayer</b></u><br/>Father God help us to have hearts of forgiveness toward others,<br/>that we will not hold offenses toward any one.<br/>We need your grace and help to live lives void of offenses.<br/>In Jesus name amen</span></div>